Jake on Jobs

Friends With (Business) Benefits

 
In business as in love, the “Friends with Benefits” arrangement sounds ideal.  You just set up a little somethin’ somethin’ on the side without setting any expectations. It’s added excitement without additional overhead.  No commitment.  In theory, it sounds perfect.

In reality, the FwB thing rarely works out.  Sure, it starts out great – you get together once a week, mess around a little bit, talk about how clever you both are, etc.  Unfortunately, as time goes on things go wrong.  Someone gets hooked, gets jealous, feels neglected, and then things get awkward.

It doesn’t have to be that way, at least not in business.  The following are five things to keep in mind when setting up a Friends With Business Benefits relationship:

1.     Begin with the end in mind
Always go into an FwB relationship with an exit strategy.  Better yet, establish clear guidelines for dissolution (or advancement) of the relationship before you get started.  That way, you both can have fun without anyone feeling trapped.
 

2.     Conduct a thorough background check
Before you jump in bed with someone, even if it’s just a side thing, you need to find out a little bit about his/her partnership history.  Is this someone who can handle casual business?  Do they flip out easily?  Do they get too attached?  Do they claim to keep all activities on the down-low then immediately tell friends (or worse, Facebook friends)?  

 
3.     Ask yourself if you’re willing to lose the relationship
Once you add benefits to a friendship, the relationship will never be the same.  Maybe it will be better, maybe it will be worse, but it will never be the way it was.  Thus, you need to be ok with the idea of losing your current friendship.  

 
4.     Don’t Cheat
Are you contractually obligated to be faithful to your job?  Does your FwB relationship threaten the foundation of your career?  If the answer is “yes”, you need to be aware that your initiation/participation in said relationship qualifies you as a shady person.

 
5.     Be Patient
This is far and away my biggest opportunity for improvement (see: problem) when it comes to Friends with Business Benefits.  I like to act on ideas quickly and I have a tendency to swarm my partners.  I am also really anal about deadlines.  If someone tells me that they're going to get something done by Tuesday and I haven’t heard anything Wednesday morning, I get frustrated.  In a primary relationship my impatience would be justified, but in a casual FwB scenario, increased patience and perspective are both required.

 
Friends With Business Benefits can be a lot of fun.  You can experiment in a casual environment and sharpen your skills.  Sometimes FwB situations can even evolve into real startups and/or committed careers.  Most of the time, however, FwB relationships crash and burn. 

Before you hop in bed, make sure you take a second to think about both the possibilities and consequences of settin’ up a lil’ somethin’ somethin’ on the side.

Phones Still Work.

Memo to Gen Y: Do not fear the phone. 

Unlike floppy disks, Folgers Crystals, typewriters, and videotapes, the telephone is not an artifact from a previous professional era. The telephone is still useful, so get comfortable with it.

I know, I know, the phone is so inefficient.  Texting is simpler and email reaches more people at once.  However, in the event that you need to communicate with one person directly, the phone is still #1.

Cosider the following two sentences:

I left you a voicemail.

vs.

Did you get my email/text?

 

The people you work with get 5 billion text messages and emails a day.  Their inboxes are filled to capacity.  You often have to contact people a second time to confirm that they received your first message, which means you can't start talking substance until your third communication.

By contrast, if you leave someone a voicemail, you can assume that they got it.  People don't get 5 billion phone calls a day.  The voicemail box is much less crowded, which allows your message to stand out.  There's a reason that Commissioner Gordon still uses a landline to get Batman' s attention.

Like synth pop and tight colorful t-shirts, the phone is making a comeback.  Embrace it.  The email-only mentality is so '90s.

Rush Hour Radio Blues

Is rush hour radio better than it used to be?

 

 

When I first graduated from college and took a 9-5, I remember thinking that rush hour radio (e.g. “Morning Rush Music” and “5 O’clock Rock Block”) was incredibly lame.  It was all early ‘80’s “Whip it” garbage and over-played tracks from The Eagles and The Police. 

 

 

Lately, however, I feel like the lineups are improving.  Last week, while driving through rush hour in Los Angeles, I was pleasantly surprised with the radio play list.  “Summertime” by Will Smith, the Foo Fighters’ “Everlong”, and Naughty By Nature’s “OPP” came on one after the other.  It was such an improvement over the Fleetwood Mac-laden monotony of Drive Time’s past.

 

 

Maybe increased competition from satellite radio has inspired regular stations to step it up.  Maybe real-time audience feedback is helping stations stay focused. 

 

 

Or maybe I’m almost 30. 

 

Crap.

CorporateToolz for the Summer

I am happy to report that, after a 5 month break (while my partners moved to Abu Dhabi) new CorporateToolz cartoons are on the way.  The new website isn't quite ready, but I will let you know when it is.

In the meantime, here's a new sketch.  I hope it doesn't bring up too many vivid memories of office-parties-gone-awkward...

 

When Professional and Social Networks Collide (Questions Arise)

For the past few months, I have been traveling around the Southeast and Midwest, helping Gen X and Baby Boomer executives develop social networking strategies for their businesses.

The following is a list of the most common questions my partners and I have heard during our sessions:

1. Who really cares about social networking?
Answer:  Several million more people than last week. This is a fairly odd question, given that the inquisitor registered for our event, but it comes up in every city.   

2. I have a Linkedin.com account.  Do I really need to mess around with the other stuff?
Answer:  Absolutely.  Especially Twitter.  And Facebook.  And Blogging.

3. Should I be building profiles for my business or myself, personally?
Answer:  Depends on the business.  My initial response is that you should have both organizational and individual accounts.  However, if your personality is closely tied to your business or brand, you can likely get away with just individual accounts.

4. How much time should I spend on this stuff every week?
Answer:  As much time as you need to make it productive.  I generally tell executives to dedicate a weekend to “setup and exploration”, after which point they can determine how much time to spend on Linkedin, Twitter, etc.  The goal is to use these networks as time-savers, eliminating less-efficient traditional tasks. 

5. How can I find latest and greatest technologies and applications to streamline my networks?
Anwer: Look on the social networking sites, themselves.  Twitter, Linkedin, and Facebook users love to share, brag, and ask about new apps in discussion forums and threads.

In other news – Everyone in Nashville should check out “SocialNet”, Nashville’s first in-person and social networking event.  It will be held downtown on June 4th.  Read more at:
https://secure.sitemason.com/form/izWTJu

10 Soul-Searching Career Questions

Be honest…

1. Would you rather be wealthy or memorable?

2. Do you want a job that you think about after work?

3. Would you like to be the smartest person at your office?

4. At what age would you like your “Most Exciting Career Moment” to take place?

5. Could you fire your closest colleague at work?

6. If you had to quit your career and start over in a different industry, what would it be?

7. Would you rather be in demand for the depth of your expertise or the breadth of your versatility?   

8. If your dream job required you to work from 5pm to 5am (60 hours a week) for 4 years, would you do it?

9. If you could sign a 12-year, $20 million contract to pick up dog poop around your neighborhood for 60 hours a week, would you do it?

10. Would you rather be revered as a subordinate or feared as the boss?

Feel free to comment.  I’d love to hear your thoughts on these.

"Green" is the new "Goth"

Last season, South Park did a brilliant episode about Vampire Kids.  Twilight (the movie) was huge and all the preppy kids at South Park Elementary began dressing like vampires, wearing fangs, and drinking fake blood.

The craze infuriated the “Goth” kids of South Park, who had been wearing eye-makeup and trench coats long before the vampire trend.  All of a sudden they were being referred to as “Vamp” along with all the posers.  Nobody cared about their genuine commitment to darkness because darkness was main stream.  The Goth kids had to look for new ways to stand out because darkness no longer set them apart.

I bring this up because, in the career world, "Green" is the new "Goth."

Everybody’s going green, which means that your desire to help the planet no longer sets you apart from other candidates in the job market.  It is admirable, but not memorable.  If you want to stand out, you need to specify a “shade” of green to pursue.  Start by answering the following questions:

Do you want to work directly on environmental initiatives or on traditional business initiatives for a company that is environmentally-aware?

 

What is your functional focus?  More specifically, what do you actually what to DO in your sustainable organization?  Non-profit or for-profit, you still need to develop professional skills.  Marketing, engineering, finance, and human resources all apply to green business. 

In your quest to go green, don’t lose sight of the workplace basics.  At the end of the day your job is to add value to an organization.  Again, your desire to go green is admirable, but your specific skills and experiences will make you memorable.

Desperate Times Call For Direct Advice

VH1’s newest trashy dating show, “Tough Love”, has me feeling inspired this week.

Like most of VH1’s dating shows, the casting on “Tough” is brilliant and there are plenty of “Oh no she didn’t” moments.  However, what sets this show apart from its predecessors is the host, Steve Ward.  Say what you will about the man-scaped, East Coast, frat-boy matchmaker, but the dude gets to the point.  His advice may be blunt, impolite, and controversial, but he gets the attention of his desperate and delusional students.

It makes me think that I’ve been a little too nice lately.

The job market is scary and young professionals are desperate (and often delusional).  Now is not the time for sugar-coated critiques.  The days of “Your resume looks pretty good but I see a few opportunities for improvement” are over.  From here on out, I’m in the Tough Love business. 

Just thought I’d give everyone a little heads up.

Drive for Better Ideas

I believe in the idea-generating power of road trips.  There’s something about the open road that invites inspiration. Throughout my career (and college before that) many of my best ideas have surfaced while I was doing 79 in between Nashville and Atlanta, Minneapolis and Madison, or San Francisco and Reno.

I think I’ve figured out why.

The following is a list of reasons why lightening is more likely to strike in the car than in the office. 

1. My brain is free to wander down the road.
Removing the pressures and parameters of agendas and to-do lists allows me to wander my way into new ideas.  Despite what type-A managers might tell you, you can’t just plan out a 15-minute “brainstorming block” in between conference calls and expect it to be productive.  You need the time to stretch your thinking.  

1b. I have time to beat up new ideas.
Not only does the road provide a reduced-stress environment for generating ideas, but it also allows me the time to kick around new ideas, beat ‘em up a bit, and make sure they're legit. 

2. I lost my car charger 2 years ago and haven’t bought another one.
During the first hour of road trips, I often feel compelled to make business calls.  However, once my phone battery wanes and I put down my cell, the drive actually becomes productive.

2b. I can’t/won't check my inbox
Unlike the office, no “productive procrastination” on the road.

3. I listen to regional radio
I try not to listen to my ipod on road trips. Instead, I opt for the characters and sounds of regional radio.  New background music for new thoughts.  Moreover, I often get ideas from the ridiculous local radio commercials I hear outside of Elko, NV or Effingham, IL. 

My advice: Respect the road.  Leave your office at the office.  If you want to take advantage of the idea-generating power of road trips, free your mind and (as En Vogue eloquently pointed out in 1992) the rest will follow.

First Rule of Business Presentations: Don’t Aim For Lame

The following three things are guaranteed to make me tune out and start daydreaming:

1.  Dinner conversations involving 401k allocation and/or wedding dresses
2.  Group musical numbers on American Idol
3.  Bullet points that appear/disappear via Power Point’s “spiral in” and “fly out” animated features.

All three items on this list are incredibly lame.  Luckily, the first two are avoidable.  The third, unfortunately, is an everyday part of my white-collar world. 

In my line of work (author/speaker/consultant) I am frequently exposed to painfully boring presentations.  In fact, the vast majority of the professional presentations I see are lame. 

This is a problem…and an opportunity.

If you are looking for a way to stand out and get a leg up at work, learn to design and deliver effective presentations.  In a world where most presenters binge on bullet points and aim for lame, you can stand out by crafting presentations that go beyond crowded slides and painful puns.

Don’t settle for a “Boy, there sure is a lot of good information in there” presentation.  Aim for “Wow!” instead.

You can start by checking out:

Deck ‘Em!  A Novel Approach to Presentation Design

I have partnered with presentation guru, Scott Schwertly, on a fast-paced ebook for people who want to learn how to create memorable business presentations. 

To learn more, read an excerpt, or order DECK ‘EM, click here.